In the car, hurry, worry,
Running late, worry, hurry.
Turn the key, come on, start it
Clicks and whirls but doesn’t catch it.
Growl and grind, and fading power
Turn and turn, and turning slower
Wretched beast, I hear what happened
Click and nothing, battery flattened
Out the box, the biggest hammer
Instead choose the ratchet spanner
Turn and turn the clicking ratchet
Drop it, curse and fail to catch it.
Down beside the engine block
Out of reach and really stuck
Scrape my knuckles, fail to reach it
How I hate the wretched ratchet.
I hate the car, its fickle state
All the worse when running late
Now I’ve really lost my cool
Gotta have the wretched tool
Dripping blood I gotta get it
Cursing blue of course I blew it
Straining hard could barely touch it
Failed to reach the wretched ratchet.
Need a stick to poke it loose
Saw the hammer resting close
Reached and grabbed and… darn it… NO…
The wretched hammer hit my toe
Darn it all, the wretched rush
Now can’t walk to catch the bus.
This piece of vaguely rhyming alliterative nonsense was brought to you by the July #BlogBattle prompt of Wretched.
Mark-Huntley-James 
We all have those wretched days.
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Yup. And I had “wretched ratchet” stuck in my head, which reminded of so many wretched days. 🙂
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Ahh yes…. one of “those” affairs with ailing inanimate objects that often get a good cursing. Mind you I think I’d advise a new tool box given the state of the current one. Wretched tools are just not cutting the mustard here Mark 😂😂
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‘Wretched ratchet’ does have a ring to it! And this piece ‘rings true’ as well. Many people can completely identify with this scenario … and perhaps this is a story inspired by actual events? 😉
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Inspired by… oh, yes. I’m currently assembling a metal building frame and there’s plenty of cursing of a certain wretched ratchet, not to mention a recent battery issue with the car.
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Well done, Mark. It is good when you can take a “wretched ratchet” event and find the comic relief. By the way, I have also groaned in despair upon hearing the clicking solenoid — the harbinger of a dying battery. P.S. You just might need a bigger hammer or a tougher toe!
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The ratchet and the car are recent events, but I have to be honest – there was no hammer and toe incident. It was a piece of wood I dropped on my toe, nearly ten years ago, but somehow the memory is still fresh and the nail still doesn’t grow right.
I have a dim memory of swearing about it at the time. What I really remember is the long pause before I could even speak enough to swear, that strange time-out-of-mind between knowing it’s going to hurt and the nerves actually responding well enough to convey the pain.
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This is a masterpiece. The rhythm was so on point. I could hear the turning noise. And then the hurry, worry theme played throughout. Marvelous!
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Thank you. I usually stick with simple prose, but this stuff is like an ear-worm.
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This is great! I love the rhythm of the piece, it really evokes the sense of rushing that your words have painted.
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